So let me preface this post by saying I KNOW things will fall perfectly in place once I give birth to my son. I felt a lot of these feelings while pregnant with Samantha….

Samantha (Baby #1) 3 days old <3

I remember while pregnant with Samantha feeling kind of sad. Don’t get me wrong, I was SO happy we were finally pregnant. It was definitely my desire I was praying for. But I knew that overseas trips, spontaneous movies nights (to an actual theater), and the carefree life of just being a couple would end. I knew I would miss that. These thoughts kind of got in the way of my bonding process with Samantha while she was in my belly. It was hard for me to actually grasp that a person was in there. I didn’t actually bond with her until she was born. Then, WOW I finally understood the love a parent feels. I look back fondly on our lifestyle as a couple, but I thoroughly enjoy us as a family of three.

Well I’ve grown so accustom to it just being the  three of us now. We knew we wanted more kids…definitely, but with how difficult it was to get pregnant with Samantha I assumed it would be similar with baby #2. Surprise!!!!! Not the case, which is so awesome. I LOVE that they will be so close in age. But again, I’m having a hard time bonding with my baby belly. I’m kind of grieving a bit because it won’t just be me and my girl anymore . I’m SO in girl mode. Funny enough I used to only want boys and now I’m trying to program myself to get back in the boy mode. I know once my eyes fall on him that I will fall so head over heals in love and will probably feel ashamed for this minor “grieving” that I’m experiencing. I’m sure being constantly uncomfortable and hormonal doesn’t help either.

I’m excited. Excited to hold my little man in my arms and just soak in the bonding that will happen and end this bummer period. I will embrace being a family of 4 (and a half if you count Daphne) and he’s going to be such a light in this household. I’m praying he’ll arrive at 37 weeks nice and plump just like his big sister did. So there you go. My honest blog post about baby #2. Not super warm and fuzzy, but it will be once he’s here =)

12 Responses to Some Honest Thoughts on Baby #2…

  1. Natasha says:

    This is so sweet. I love how honest it is. The loss of spontaneity is something I kind of fear once we’re ready to have kids. I feel like I so rarely see moms-to-be talk about that so honestly, so this is super refreshing :)
    You must be getting SO excited to meet your baby boy!
    xoxo

  2. Amanda Rose says:

    It is perfectly okay to feel some grief when moving from one stage of life to another. This is natural. We are afraid to let go of what we know we like, and travel into the unknown. Keep in mind that you can’t get to where you want to be or become who you want to be by staying the same. This picture is so precious. Good luck!

    Amanda Rose
    http://sewmuchtosay.blogspot.com

  3. I agree with Amanda, it’s okay and normal to feel a certain amount of grief from moving on to the next step. You’ll get to where you need to be.

  4. Alexa says:

    Hey Sarah I love your honesty in this post. I had a really hard time in the days and weeks AFTER Mila was born. That was my grieving time for our previous life I guess. I love that little person like nobody’s business…but it is such a HUGE transition, and in no way can you prepare for it. Being a parent, although challenging, is one of the most amazing things ever. I know that little boy is one lucky dude. :)

  5. Bon Bon says:

    ok. little baby girl #1 was (is) out of this world adorable:-) and thanks for keeping it real! This is definitely something I’ve already thought about…and then I have to remind myself how amazing and encompassing and unconditional a mother’s love is! Change is good (especially a new human life addition-change:-) AND every kid is different. So, you’re gonna be one loved on little mama! xoxo

  6. The Millers says:

    I love how honest you are. It was hard for me to adjust to life as 3, instead of just 2. But, it’s definitely been the best adjustment yet. I know that the moment you see your little guy, you will be head over heels for him. Xo

  7. Rosie says:

    I love how honest this post is. I think when Lily was a bump, I did eventually bond, but I would still have days of not feeling bonded to her and would feel so guilty! But you are right, when you set eyes on them, you just fall for them completely x

  8. such an honest and sweet post! you will be the best mommy to that little man!
    xo TJ

  9. sherri lynn says:

    I think it’s great that you’re being so honest with your feelings that have come with this second pregnancy! I feel like it’s all probably pretty normal. I think I would have a hard time feeling “bonded” with my baby belly too, because I would just have a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that there’s a little person in there! Your little boy is going to be so loved – and so cute! :)

  10. I have having really similar feelings. I feel soooo happy that I have a new little guy coming but at the same time feel a little guilty to say…I wonder how much less me time I am going to have and wonder if I can love someone else as much as my first child (I know I can). Just like you said I know things will all fall into place but I’m still feeling unsure about becoming a mom of 2!

  11. Rachel says:

    Fingers crossed he’ll be here at 37 weeks!I seriously thought she wasn’t real until I looked closely!Absolutely beautiful!!!

  12. Michael says:

    Our two last children are only 19 months apart and they were the BEST of friends all through childhood. As brother and sister there was a rough period during that awkward high school phase but then it all came together again in young adulthood. Congrats and enjoy that little fella now, while he’s contained, and when he steps into the world.

    Blessings.

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